Heavy Love: Can You Move It Alone?

fighting couple

Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered,

1 Corinthians 13:4–5

“Love is patient. Love is kind of getting old.” These are lyrics from my friend, Wes Bowker’s, song Carolina.” I can’t help but think of these lyrics every time I read 1 Corinthians 13. This is the real problem with how we choose to love. Love gets old. Love befalls routine. Love becomes something that happens to us, rather than something we offer and fight to preserve. As we are winding up the month we’re all told we have to love each other, some of us might be thinking of how we can show love for another person next Thanksgiving through Valentine’s Day. If you are in this boat, it is probably filling up with water and looking to capsize very soon.

God doesn’t want us to fall in love. He wants us to build our love. We find what love is, what love isn’t and what love does not do here in chapter 13. Unfortunately, we allow ourselves to forget these three areas in times of conflict. Some call it temporary insanity or selective memory. Love does not act unbecomingly, or love does not act ugly. My mom used to tell me, “God don’t like ugly.” And it’s true. This may be a news flash, but your spouse “don’t like ugly.” If we are going to build our love we must constantly be in control of our words, our actions, our reactions and our motives. We say we love each other in the morning, before we go off to work, when we get home from work, before bed and when something nice is done for us. What about when people aren’t very loveable? Do we still love?

I’ve heard couples say that love has gotten to be burdensome or like a heavy weight. That does happen, but when it does remember you’re never going to move it alone. You have to share in the load and be ready to take whatever weight is necessary. Since love does not seek its own, it does not love for its own gain, but for that of others. Because love does not take into account evil done to itself, it seeks to improve the situation using pertinent information that will bring about solutions. Is your love crumbling today? Why not build it? Love, even when it ‘feels’ impossible

But now faith, hope, love, abide these three; but the greatest of these is love.

1 Corinthians 13:13

Chuck Ramseur

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